Lochte dating

Personal Life: Is Ryan Lochte Married? On his personal life back in 2012, there were rumors he was dating Blair Evans, an Australian swimmer, but the mother put the rumors to rest. Today he is a married man as he wedded Kayla Rae Reid in January 2018 after meeting her in October 2016. He is also a father to Caiden Zane Lochte. Ryan Steven Lochte ( LOK-tee; born August 3, 1984) is an American competitive swimmer and 12-time Olympic medalist. Along with Natalie Coughlin, Dara Torres, and Jenny Thompson, he is the second-most decorated swimmer in Olympic history measured by total number of medals, behind only Michael Phelps. Lochte has not been quite or ashamed about his search for love, either. In January of this year, Lochte's representative confirmed that Lochte was a member of dating apps, Raya and Bumble, giving ... Ryan Lochte’s Girlfriend. Ryan Lochte is single. He is not dating anyone currently. Ryan had at least 4 relationship in the past. Ryan Lochte has not been previously engaged. His mother is named Ileana. In 2016, he got engaged to Kayla Rae Reid. They welcomed a son named Caiden Zane on June 8, 2017. According to our records, he has 1 children. “Lochte is known for taking different girls . to the same restaurant for a first date.” Katie Duggan, 35, of St. Augustine, Fla., said she would want a first date with a small town celebrity such as Lochte to be personal and private, like having him cook her dinner, but would be hesitant about being on camera. Last week, Reid wished Lochte a happy birthday, calling him her “favorite person on the planet” and a “silver fox.” (In case you missed it, the 32-year-old athlete dyed his hair ice blue ...

A Realistic and Skillful Approach To Convert the Inevitable Shambhala Day Fundraising Push into an Opportunity for Transformation

2020.02.02 08:46 Soraidh A Realistic and Skillful Approach To Convert the Inevitable Shambhala Day Fundraising Push into an Opportunity for Transformation

(Note: a draft of this post can be downloaded as a PDF with workable links at https://ufile.io/8l0dhtk8)
I. INTRO
There are so many pieces to assemble to see the full Shambhala picture. It doesn’t help that pieces are deliberately either in plain view, locked in a bunker or displayed partially with obscure meaning. One thing for sure is that the combined Shambhala/Mukpo assets are vast and backed by a very few wealthy, sophisticated, self-interested and power-hungry people. It’s a group that will play “hard ball” and outsource its dirty, amoral tricks to the best money can buy so it can carry on the legacy of “plausible deniability”.
II. REFRESHER ON THE SAKYONG FOUNDATION
As a reminder, there’s a peculiar shell game that’s continued for years and went into high gear 2016-18. For now, let’s just look at 2018-19. Remember the NON-PROFIT Sakyong Foundation (BTW, for those intently curious about the intended uses and real ownership of the Landrag/Potrang, Sakyong Foundation, Kalapa, etc., this 2009 article breaks down the original ideas very well, although it never quite worked as described.) You may remember that, although it targeted a $20m endowment by 2020, best evidence is that it only had a few million in its coffers by 2017 (that’s after paying legal fees and financial management fees to members and family of the Kalapa Council). Donors aren’t generally disclosed (nor were references to whether donations were restricted) and they only listed a few projects that were a pittance when compared to the amounts donated (they’re also discrete about the use of donations overseas to benefit the “King of Shambhala’s” (“KoS”) community). Their web site vanished around August 1, 2018 BUT they left just one page alive, it directs people to Jane Vosper if someone is interested in contributing, this suggest it is still open to collect cash but now very much underground without disclosing uses.
The proclaimed mission of the Sakyong Foundation is (was?):
“Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche established the Sakyong Foundation in the Spring of 2006 to provide support to organizations and projects throughout the world whose activities exemplify the vision of Shambhala: a contemplative tradition grounded in the view that the path to peace for individuals and society is based on the cultivation of universal human qualities of wisdom, compassion and courage.”
Wonder if any person considered, no less risked raising the heretical idea, that such funds could be used as a demonstration to retain community and societal confidence if they were applied to address prior harms and seek formats to explore the causes and reform internally. (If curious, here’s a 2008 article that tried to unravel the abrupt blossoming financial organizations and how they related to each other – note the prominence of the Foundation).
III. THE STRANGELY TIMED RESURGENCE OF FOR-PROFIT SAHARA WHILE NEGLECTING COMMITMENTS TO CARE, CONDUCT, TRANSFORMATION AND DECENCY
We’ve also been introduced to the Saraha twins, the for-profit mirror companies formed at the same time as the Foundation, but with only crumbs of public records real estate, oil industry and mining deals plus political donations (uncovered at the gold standard aggregator of known political contributions, OPEN SECRETS.
IV. THE TIMING OF EVENTS DOESN’T APPEAR COINCIDENTAL
- June 25, 2018: Unexpected Letter from KoS admitting relations with students in the past who “felt harmed” (not that he caused them harm) and like waving a magic wand sought absolution by expressing sorrow for his role (this ignores that the “role” of a perpetrator is often the “cause” of harm).
- June 27, 2018: KC sends emails seeking harmony ironically stating that it never sought legal action against any person nor “ever asked a victim to remain silent” – statements blown up in the leaked KC minutes and the late summer law firm threat.
- June 28, 2018: PBS2 released
- June 28, 2018: Huh, what, same day? Saraha LLC in CO suddenly and ironically opens up a brand-new division in OR with Jeff Walchter at the helm and Jane Vosper as the “operations Officer”. (In May 2019 its state-chartered mission changed to Land and Water Investments and Walchter’s title shifted to formal manager). Is it a coincidence that the Sakyong Foundation removed all information from its web site 6-8 weeks after the OR Saraha formation and the people who operated the Foundation shifted to Saraha (just wonderin’)?
A few more event dates to fill in smaller pieces so this makes sense at the end:
- May 10, 2019: Alex Halpern’s name is formally removed as the attorney for Marpa House and a person outside Shambhala is substituted, suggesting a deal had already been signed.
- May 16, 2019: Saraha Oregon switches its official purpose to an investment firm focused on real estate and water rights.
- May 19, 2019: The IB announces the MAGNANIMOUS $90k matching gift contribution made by the “treasurer” of the Portland, Oregon Shambhala Center (and an associate) to benefit Global Services, emphasizing the goal of filling the Care & Conduct position full time.
- Around Harvest of Peace, 2019: Jane Vosper (where have I heard that name?) announced that “as a MEMBER of the Potrang” (there’s only a few, but she seems to have her hands in every money pot even as the IB tries to straighten out Global Services) sends this e-mail to Scorpion practitioners asking for A LOT of money (baseline per person -= thousands per year, the collective contributions must be staggering) – for THE POTRANG. No mention of addressing, benefiting or redressing the moral and ethical lapses that harmed so many, but only glorifies the spiritual importance of a student opening their wallets to their teacher so that the guru has more resources to guide and benefit society.
V. THE MESSY QUESTIONS THAT TIE THIS TOGETHER; WHY WAS THE CARE & CONDUCT/HR POSITION VACANT FOR A LACK OF FUNDS THAT THE COMMUNITY AT LARGE WAS ASKED TO FILL WHEN THIS WAS A PRIORITY WELL WITHIN THE MISSION STATEMENT OF THE SAKYONG FOUNDATION (NO LESS POTRANG) THAT HAD VAST RESOURCES TO FUND THE SALARY AND BENEFITS FOR AT LEAST ONE, IF NOT THREE YEARS? WHAT DOES THIS SAY ABOUT THE SINCERITY AND PRIORITY OF ADDRESSING ORGANIZATIONAL HARM AND INSTITUTIONAL OPRESSION? LET’S LOOK AT WHERE THE MONEY DID GO FOR ANSWERS
On July 6, 2018, the same day that the KC meeting transcript leak prompted a hasty announcement by the KC (then KoS) that they would step aside, the wizards behind the curtain also announced that anybody with questions should refer them to Mat Hiltzik of Hiltzik Strategies (who declined to comment that day). Hmmmmm, Mat, who does NOT do legal work and focuses entirely on PR, isn’t the type who takes a client without a few meetings and sufficient vetting, so it’s obvious he was already retained as the storm clouds gathered (who knew?). Yet, no disclosures about how long he was retained, how much was paid and by whom even though it was probably one of the largest 2018 expenses. Take a look at the following while remembering the begging bowl passed around for the sake of community healing and progress:
a. Mat regularly appears as one of the top 10 PR managers in the U.S. His retainers and fees are generally confidential and it would be improper to disclose any knowledge of his operations that occur in his office only a few blocks from the now closed NYC center. There is, however, plenty of circumstantial information in the public domain to give an idea that MH only works for the most powerful and wealthy, and even they try to keep him on a short leash on his fees. Examples:
b. In April 2018 AMI (the owner of the National Enquirer among others with deep ties to Donald Trump, plus recent questions the Royal Saudi Family after the hack of Jeff Bezos’ phone) entered into a settlement agreement with Karen McDougal to revise and resolve disclosures about the affair between Trump and McDougal. That 2018 agreement built upon a December 2016 agreement, and in THAT agreement (attached as Exhibit 1 to the 2018 agreement), paragraph 7 references that AMI would retain Hiltzik to manage its PR. Not a cheap deal, peeps.
c. Or how about an elite charity fundraiser seeking to auction something very valuable deciding that a “lunch with Hiltzik ” (donated by Hiltzik himself) should be up for auction. The winning bidder would have lunch with a person who:
“has represented some of the most prominent sports, entertainment, and political figures (e.g. Ryan Lochte, Alec Baldwin, and Justin Bieber), making him the go-to person for PR management and an invaluable person to sit down with for a one-on-one consultation.”
d. According to the NY Observer, in 2016 MH was the 7th most powerful PR firms in the U.S., stating, in part:
“For every celeb brand like Drake’s October’s Very Own and Gwyneth’s Goop, there’s an investment group, litigation client, sports organization, media brand or charity event getting Hiltzik’s guidance. Longtime clients like Katie Couric and the higher-ups at MGM also have him on speed dial.”
Somehow, the KoS and his court sycophants had the means to go straight to the top of the “hired gun” public image manager without blinking an eye to protect personal reputations and liabilities, while money didn’t seem like an obstacle. I am not generically opposed to seeking PR guidance, but how is it that a spiritual non-profit contemplative “kingdom” proclaiming to seek a better society didn’t consider that the millions in its coffers could be better used to implement a C&C policy and go “all out” to find the best and most effective and discerning solutions? Were those funds intermingled to cover personal – NOT ORGANIZATIONAL – protections of image and from liability?
VI. A RATIONAL APPROACH
With Shambhala Day approaching and secret meetings of Shambhala’s finance and legal minions plan a strategy for a massive 2020 cash haul from the membership at large, is it unreasonable to just ask WTF???
Ask how finances are managed???
Ask why repaying the Potrangs in 2019 held precedence over aggressive and credible action to implement at least one half of the palliative plans announced in July 2018? Even if page3 of The Olive Branch’s final report stated they felt “distanced from our client”, communications became “less frequent”, and an unexpected “budget overrun” forced them to “[cap] the budget” because “four of the project elements were deemed to be unaffordable no longer", they still delivered a revised C&C policy in September 2018 with continued suggestion through March 2019.
The HARD push to open our wallets will soon be unleashed. Perhaps, for those of us uninvited to the tiny group within The Land of Oz, the ideal strategy for the short term is to avoid individual donation/matching gift lures and diminish monthly dues. Absent answers, the small and wealthy insular community will be fine. One final note, although people can choose to zero out all contributions, those who still leave some “skin in the game” retain more options to either transform/transition to a new regime (if possible) or formally challenge the spiritual oligarchs should that become a viable option.
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2020.01.01 22:20 autobuzzfeedbot 39 of the most controversial and shocking events from the past decade that we're still talking about today

  1. 2019: President Donald Trump was accused of withholding military aid from Ukraine unless they announced an investigation into former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter Biden. The Democrats launched an impeachment inquiry.
  2. 2019: Jeffrey Epstein was charged with sex trafficking following allegations of molesting dozens of young girls.
  3. 2019: More than 50 people were indicted as part of a massive college admissions scandal.
  4. 2019: Khloe Kardashian's boyfriend, Tristan Thompson, cheated on her with Kylie Jenner's best friend, Jordyn Woods.
  5. 2018: The Senate Intelligence Committee determined that Russia interfered with the 2016 presidential election.
  6. 2018: Data-analysis firm Cambridge Analytica was accused of using and keeping data of 50 million Facebook users without their permission.
  7. 2018: Reports emerge that Trump's lawyer Michael Cohen paid adult film actress Stormy Daniels $130,000 to stay silent about their alleged affair.
  8. 2017: YouTuber Logan Paul posted a video in Japan’s ’Suicide Forest,’ launching international criticism.
  9. 2017: Sexual assault allegations against Harvey Weinstein unleashed a movement against sexual misconduct in Hollywood and beyond. It was called #MeToo.
  10. 2017: After facing decades of sexual abuse allegations, R. Kelly was accused of holding six women in his homes as part of a 'sex cult.'
  11. 2017: Fyre Fest organizers duped thousands of people into going to a music festival that didn't exist.
  12. 2016: Hundreds of women accused Former USA Gymnastics team doctor Larry Nassar of molesting them as children.
  13. 2016: Anthony Weiner sexted a 15-year-old girl and later served prison time for it.
  14. 2016: A recording of Donald Trump saying he could grab women 'by the p----' leaked a month before the presidential election. He still won.
  15. 2016: 12-time Olympic medalist Ryan Lochte lied about being robbed at the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro
  16. 2016: More than a dozen women accused Fox News chairman Roger Ailes of sexual misconduct.
  17. 2016: The Panama Papers leak revealed a network of thousands of off-shore holding companies worth more than a billion dollars.
  18. 2016: Hulk Hogan sued the media website Gawker for posting his sex tape — and won.
  19. 2015: Martin Shkreli raised the cost of the anti-malaria drug Daraprim from $13.50 to $750. Then he was arrested on fraud charges.
  20. 2015: Ashley Madison, America's most prominent dating site for cheating spouses, was hacked.
  21. 2015: Dozens of FIFA executives and officials were implicated in a years-long corruption investigation into the organization.
  22. 2015: Hillary Clinton released 55,000 pages of emails to the State Department amid concern she used a personal email server while serving as secretary of state.
  23. 2015: New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady was suspended after 'Deflategate.'
  24. 2014: Allegations of Bill Cosby sexually assaulting women began to emerge after comedian Hannibal Buress did a bit about Cosby 'raping women' in a stand-up routine.
  25. 2014: Hackers stole nude photos and information from iClouds belonging to Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, and 200 others.
  26. 2014: Footage emerged of Solange Knowles hitting her brother-in-law Jay-Z in an elevator at a Met Gala after party.
  27. 2013: Anthony Weiner's New York mayoral campaign was derailed by more sexting allegations.
  28. 2013: New England Patriots player Aaron Hernandez was arrested on murder charges in the death of Odin Lloyd.
  29. 2013: TV cooking personality Paula Deen was recorded calling her black employees the N-word.
  30. 2013: Edward Snowden leaked thousands of documents he stole from the National Security Agency.
  31. 2013: Video emerged showing Toronto Mayor Rob Ford smoking what appeared to be crack cocaine.
  32. 2013: Lance Armstrong admitted to using performance-enhancing drugs.
  33. 2012: David Petraeus resigned as director of the CIA after admitting to having an affair with his biographer, Paula Broadwell.
  34. 2012: The Benghazi attacks on a US diplomatic compound sparked a political firestorm.
  35. 2011: Former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky was accused of molesting young boys.
  36. 2011: Rupert Murdoch's News of the World tabloid was closed after 168-years following phone-hacking allegations.
  37. 2011: Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries got married. Then they got divorced 72 days later.
  38. 2011: Former US Senator John Edwards was accused of spending nearly $1 million to keep his mistress in hiding during his 2008 presidential campaign.
  39. 2011: Anthony Weiner accidentally posted a photo of his crotch on Twitter, launching the first of many social media-fueled scandals he would face.
Link to article
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2019.12.04 15:20 autobuzzfeedbot 39 of the most controversial and shocking events from the past decade that we're still talking about today

  1. 2019: President Donald Trump was accused of withholding military aid from Ukraine unless they announced an investigation into former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter Biden. The Democrats launched an impeachment inquiry.
  2. 2019: Jeffrey Epstein was charged with sex trafficking following allegations of molesting dozens of young girls.
  3. 2019: More than 50 people were indicted as part of a massive college admissions scandal.
  4. 2019: Khloe Kardashian's boyfriend, Tristan Thompson, cheated on her with Kylie Jenner's best friend, Jordyn Woods.
  5. 2018: The Senate Intelligence Committee determined that Russia interfered with the 2016 presidential election.
  6. 2018: Data-analysis firm Cambridge Analytica was accused of using and keeping data of 50 million Facebook users without their permission.
  7. 2018: Reports emerge that Trump's lawyer Michael Cohen paid adult film actress Stormy Daniels $130,000 to stay silent about their alleged affair.
  8. 2017: YouTuber Logan Paul posted a video in Japan’s ’Suicide Forest,’ launching international criticism.
  9. 2017: Sexual assault allegations against Harvey Weinstein unleashed a movement against sexual misconduct in Hollywood and beyond. It was called #MeToo.
  10. 2017: After facing decades of sexual abuse allegations, R. Kelly was accused of holding six women in his homes as part of a 'sex cult.'
  11. 2017: Fyre Fest organizers duped thousands of people into going to a music festival that didn't exist.
  12. 2016: Hundreds of women accused Former USA Gymnastics team doctor Larry Nassar of molesting them as children.
  13. 2016: Anthony Weiner sexted a 15-year-old girl and later served prison time for it.
  14. 2016: A recording of Donald Trump saying he could grab women 'by the p----' leaked a month before the presidential election. He still won.
  15. 2016: 12-time Olympic medalist Ryan Lochte lied about being robbed at the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro
  16. 2016: More than a dozen women accused Fox News chairman Roger Ailes of sexual misconduct.
  17. 2016: The Panama Papers leak revealed a network of thousands of off-shore holding companies worth more than a billion dollars.
  18. 2016: Hulk Hogan sued the media website Gawker for posting his sex tape — and won.
  19. 2015: Martin Shkreli raised the cost of the anti-malaria drug Daraprim from $13.50 to $750. Then he was arrested on fraud charges.
  20. 2015: Ashley Madison, America's most prominent dating site for cheating spouses, was hacked.
  21. 2015: Dozens of FIFA executives and officials were implicated in a years-long corruption investigation into the organization.
  22. 2015: Hillary Clinton released 55,000 pages of emails to the State Department amid concern she used a personal email server while serving as secretary of state.
  23. 2015: New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady was suspended after 'Deflategate.'
  24. 2014: Allegations of Bill Cosby sexually assaulting women began to emerge after comedian Hannibal Buress did a bit about Cosby 'raping women' in a stand-up routine.
  25. 2014: Hackers stole nude photos and information from iClouds belonging to Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, and 200 others.
  26. 2014: Footage emerged of Solange Knowles hitting her brother-in-law Jay-Z in an elevator at a Met Gala after party.
  27. 2013: Anthony Weiner's New York mayoral campaign was derailed by more sexting allegations.
  28. 2013: New England Patriots player Aaron Hernandez was arrested on murder charges in the death of Odin Lloyd.
  29. 2013: TV cooking personality Paula Deen was recorded calling her black employees the N-word.
  30. 2013: Edward Snowden leaked thousands of documents he stole from the National Security Agency.
  31. 2013: Video emerged showing Toronto Mayor Rob Ford smoking what appeared to be crack cocaine.
  32. 2013: Lance Armstrong admitted to using performance-enhancing drugs.
  33. 2012: David Petraeus resigned as director of the CIA after admitting to having an affair with his biographer, Paula Broadwell.
  34. 2012: The Benghazi attacks on a US diplomatic compound sparked a political firestorm.
  35. 2011: Former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky was accused of molesting young boys.
  36. 2011: Rupert Murdoch's News of the World tabloid was closed after 168-years following phone-hacking allegations.
  37. 2011: Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries got married. Then they got divorced 72 days later.
  38. 2011: Former US Senator John Edwards was accused of spending nearly $1 million to keep his mistress in hiding during his 2008 presidential campaign.
  39. 2011: Anthony Weiner accidentally posted a photo of his crotch on Twitter, launching the first of many social media-fueled scandals he would face.
Link to article
submitted by autobuzzfeedbot to buzzfeedbot [link] [comments]


2019.05.05 18:33 Aldabruzzo Where Did All The Good Christian Men Go? There Aren't Any, According to Women's Definition of "Good Men".

To women, a "good man" has:
the grit of John Wayne
the body of Ryan Lochte
or the body of this guy
the financial portfolio of Warren Buffett (no pic needed)
the spirituality of Billy Graham
the smirking personality of young Bruce Willis
the hotness of Channing Tatum
and the compassion of the nice guy beta orbiter.
And no one can possibly fit that bill.
We used to live in a society where women would compromise here and there and be more or less satisfied with what they got. No more. If you're lacking in even one area, if you can't hit every single high note, well, you just suck, and you're worthless, and you're just done before you even get out of the gate.
That's what Christian women are doing now. The guys they go to church with are abject pussies and soyboys in every sense of the word. The guys they date use and abuse them, pump and dump them.
The church guys they refuse to date can't bring the hotness. The guys they date and fuck bring the hotness but don't stick around.
Yeah. Guess what? You'll be looking real good to these girls 10 years and 25 guys later. THEN and ONLY THEN will they deign to give you any attention.
You have to be hot, rich, nice, educated, articulate, professionally accomplished and distinguished, have the physical fitness of a bodybuilder or world class Olympian, able to rattle off at least 25 bible verses from memory, able to preach a sermon off the top of your head, a volunteer for worthy causes, an Eagle Scout, and a puppy rescuer.
And if you aren't every single one of these things, you are OUT OUT OUT. If you aren't every single one of these things, you are not a "Good Man".
That's the problem with Christian women today.
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Hahnchester Awesome Fresh Cheese Unbranded Bacon Userfriendly tangible Meme Gear sorority university viral video controversy Mrs Price Jenkins meme tan monitor parse monitor Joannyburgh Generic Steel Chips Practical Keyboard Advanced coherent Meme Gear Sudden Clarity Clarence on the Tv show Dinosaurs Isabel Leuschke Jr meme azure microchip copy microchip New Alexanderton Unbranded Rubber Shoes Ergonomic Pants Persistent national Meme Gear My experience on ratheism Miss Bella Dickinson meme plum firewall bypass firewall Kingberg Incredible Frozen Gloves Handcrafted Salad Visionoriented static Meme Gear brick wall optical illusion when you see it Marjorie Nicolas meme salmon bandwidth bypass bandwidth North Marguerite Sleek Fresh Fish Rustic Fish Automated analyzing Meme Gear photos cheesy decoration social network myspace gif Juanita Williamson meme silver alarm copy alarm Kertzmannland Fantastic Concrete Chair Incredible Bike Openarchitected impactful Meme Gear This is why I never get girls Edwin Schaefer meme ivory hard drive copy hard drive Opalport Refined Concrete Computer Handcrafted Chips Exclusive systemworthy Meme Gear 4chan final fantasy Noah Boehm I meme orange protocol input protocol New Devinborough Gorgeous Cotton Car Tasty Pizza Operative clientdriven Meme Gear remix 911 911 fincher eyes wide shut r david lynch cronenberg Myles Kovacek meme violet panel bypass panel Kuvalisfort Incredible Steel Gloves Unbranded Chicken Face to face directional Meme Gear shion sonozaki crazy anime higurashi chick death laughter -
submitted by areohdeee to MemeGear [link] [comments]


2019.01.03 01:09 areohdeee Memes Gear - jvotpuysnhwzkfgnes - Meme Merch.

Meme Gear! Memes Merch CHEAP AND FREE SHIPPING on Ebay and Etsy!!!! -------->>

https://www.etsy.com/listing/648242908/im-already-tracer-meme-keychain-memes?ruosvzxpq 1263443
Marta Keebler meme red circuit back up circuit West Karolannside Fantastic Frozen Gloves Tasty Computer Reengineered responsive Meme Gear Asked my friend what time it was He forgot the word for midnight Dayna Greenfelder meme cyan application input application Andersonburgh Gorgeous Soft Chicken Tasty Mouse Profound empowering Meme Gear video game indie farming simulator steam Greyson Hills meme turquoise application reboot application East Kodyland Handmade Plastic Gloves Handmade Pants Devolved humanresource Meme Gear spoiler alert Johnnie Parker meme azure bus synthesize bus South Vada Small Frozen Shoes Unbranded Chair Synergistic local Meme Gear daniel dumile zev love x king geedorah king ghidra viktor vaughn metal fingers king dumile doom madvillain madvillainy kmd hiphop rap operation doomsday Elmo Anderson meme red feed input feed Lake Madelynn Fantastic Wooden Cheese Incredible Bacon Virtual contentbased Meme Gear image avatar penny arcade animated gif genmay mascot Ms Kayden Carter meme grey panel back up panel New Nilsview Sleek Granite Pizza Gorgeous Tuna Versatile disintermediate Meme Gear dance judson laipply laipply youtube classics roflcon iii Carlos Rau PhD meme lime capacitor transmit capacitor Port Chasity Ergonomic Metal Salad Fantastic Hat Reduced realtime Meme Gear kirby art feet gross creepy Mr Raymundo Kris meme blue pixel calculate pixel West Cleve Gorgeous Concrete Bike Awesome Pizza Persistent nonvolatile Meme Gear cruz gop trump 2016 sanders feelthebern fox news cnn campaign hillary clinton whitehouse obama zodiak killer politics revolution bernie faux news Westley Wehner meme violet panel program panel Port Myah Licensed Metal Pants Small Mouse Advanced 247 Meme Gear squirtle face 4chan facepunch pokemon template exploitable Quincy Berge Sr meme white pixel override pixel North Alverta Awesome Cotton Soap Tasty Salad Assimilated tangible Meme Gear original meme mike stephens racquetball pls sub 2 meh yt i need 2 revenue Sunny Funk V meme blue panel quantify panel Skileschester Rustic Cotton Computer Awesome Chips Networked 247 Meme Gear reaction face bueno Shawn Gerhold meme tan monitor quantify monitor Darbyfurt Incredible Cotton Keyboard Small Tuna Publickey logistical Meme Gear ukelele stock music Janet Carter meme ivory driver input driver Port Raquel Ergonomic Granite Keyboard Sleek Chips Profitfocused 24 hour Meme Gear video game weapon half life gordon freeman Adolf Schaden meme olive card compress card Ratketon Intelligent Metal Bike Tasty Car Configurable analyzing Meme Gear none Emmanuel Ondricka PhD meme yellow alarm generate alarm Erdmanside Ergonomic Granite Chips Gorgeous Fish Intuitive methodical Meme Gear bat country stop catchphrase vegas movie quote fear and loathing in las vegas Ed Kemmer meme maroon monitor transmit monitor West Mercedes Fantastic Steel Gloves Small Car Integrated 3rd generation Meme Gear cartoon tv comedy eric south park cartman sitcom animated series cartoon title fall 2014 Noel Eichmann meme red driver hack driver Maddisonland Ergonomic Steel Shoes Awesome Ball Integrated needsbased Meme Gear Everyone has this friend in their group of friends Paxton Jacobs meme azure bus program bus Port Andy Sleek Fresh Fish Gorgeous Table Networked 247 Meme Gear none Arno Jakubowski meme lime capacitor reboot capacitor Champlinton Handmade Rubber Sausages Incredible Ball Inverse empowering Meme Gear 50 cent rapper smirk reaction image mashup entourage stare gif staredown hip hop Bridget Effertz meme teal application program application Jasenshire Licensed Concrete Bacon Intelligent Shirt Phased discrete Meme Gear have a bowl mr squidward spongebob lolmanxd444 spongebob squarepants Lura Lehner meme silver array compress array South Kayden Intelligent Plastic Bacon Unbranded Mouse Visionary clearthinking Meme Gear antifandom pop culture vinyl figure Charlene Ebert meme plum feed bypass feed Lake Merl Tasty Rubber Shoes Refined Tuna Fundamental asymmetric Meme Gear fast food breakfast brand meme tumblr Marian Koch meme gold bus navigate bus East Richmond Unbranded Cotton Salad Handmade Salad Ergonomic 3rd generation Meme Gear marvel comics superheroes dc mcu film cameos avengers comic books ironman spiderman loki Alaina McClure meme lime hard drive reboot hard drive Ullrichview Sleek Soft Computer Sleek Sausages Intuitive composite Meme Gear none Mr Nicole Effertz meme black array compress array South Theresamouth Intelligent Steel Car Handmade Bike Switchable composite Meme Gear jakie chan carl sagan responsitory brain mind is full of wtf jackie chan Robbie Hermiston meme violet microchip input microchip Port Haleigh Handmade Granite Bacon Intelligent Shirt Standalone contentbased Meme Gear my little pony friendhip magic bronies label online community fandom Nasir Barrows II meme olive card transmit card South Reynamouth Licensed Metal Chicken Handmade Chicken Functionbased 4th generation Meme Gear the social network facebook mark zuckerberg multi pane notables of 2011 blacklist reaction face stare Jackson Skiles meme gold sensor index sensor Lake Berthamouth Fantastic Metal Sausages Gorgeous Salad Ameliorated reciprocal Meme Gear wikipedia belguim kaster blastoise rape Mrs Dino Boyle meme green feed parse feed North Allan Sleek Cotton Mouse Sleek Chicken Progressive impactful Meme Gear miss congeniality mock holiday april 25th the perfect date light jacket day beauty pageant movie movie references sandra bullock Katlyn Konopelski meme azure driver generate driver Jonesfort Tasty Plastic Tuna Fantastic Bacon Customerfocused highlevel Meme Gear austin rodolph austin rodolph Augusta Watsica meme maroon monitor back up monitor West Jewellshire Generic Rubber Tuna Licensed Salad Focused stable Meme Gear mass effect mass effect 3 me3 Virginie Abernathy meme yellow monitor input monitor West Maxview Fantastic Soft Soap Tasty Chair Visionoriented 24 hour Meme Gear clark stanley clark and stanley spore galactic galactic adventures ga spore ga adventure kill dead die and adventures video game mac pc pc gaming customization Trinity Daugherty meme azure protocol hack protocol West Elianview Handmade Frozen Car Practical Hat Objectbased radical Meme Gear a misrible little pile of secrets audio clip cutsceen video game konami Leonora Herzog meme violet protocol parse protocol Port Damienhaven Awesome Concrete Pizza Refined Tuna Innovative actuating Meme Gear monsquaz Caleb Watsica meme salmon feed parse feed South Raybury Gorgeous Frozen Fish Licensed Pants Integrated 4th generation Meme Gear cuphead gay Nicolette Deckow meme silver interface back up interface West Lorena Tasty Rubber Keyboard Licensed Cheese Deengineered optimizing Meme Gear overwatch i need healing jeff kaplin genji jeff kaplin holding i need healing picture Santos Nicolas meme black card compress card North Raphaellechester Small Plastic Shirt Awesome Computer Diverse contextsensitive Meme Gear taylor swift yelling goat goat edition screaming goat taylor swift goat i knew goats were trouble goat goats Daisy Bartoletti meme white pixel generate pixel North Myrtieshire Incredible Granite Cheese Generic Pizza Optional tertiary Meme Gear swingset racer image macro 4chan win exploitable Rupert Mohr meme violet hard drive connect hard drive Lake Garrison Refined Steel Hat Practical Keyboard Fundamental freshthinking Meme Gear rio de janeiro 2016 summer olympics olympics ryan lochte swimmer scandal Lorenzo Larson meme lime firewall index firewall New Hazle Gorgeous Frozen Cheese Refined Hat Assimilated intermediate Meme Gear wiki site encyclopedia Joan Rippin DVM meme pink feed copy feed West Rachael Licensed Fresh Bacon Ergonomic Car Functionbased demanddriven Meme Gear criminal murder cult Elvera Conn meme teal transmitter navigate transmitter North Jamelborough Small Metal Keyboard Refined Fish Automated intermediate Meme Gear clip fall news fail ireland snow ice facebook Alexandre Huels DVM meme white port quantify port East Bertafurt Handmade Steel Shoes Licensed Chicken Persistent didactic Meme Gear parody activism crowd sourcing sign campaign selfie Gilda Krajcik meme blue pixel reboot pixel Purdyfurt Sleek Fresh Keyboard Practical Table Distributed leading edge Meme Gear Seriously though Bailee Champlin meme pink alarm bypass alarm Kilbacktown Tasty Metal Chair Refined Table Polarised hybrid Meme Gear music vampireweekend violins Sierra Stokes meme magenta protocol bypass protocol Wolfside Handcrafted Concrete Car Fantastic Mouse Openarchitected empowering Meme Gear mars arnold schwarzenegger air cohaagen Edd Turner meme indigo array copy array North Arvidfurt Small Metal Chips Fantastic Pizza Persevering responsive Meme Gear webcomics vg cats scott ramsoomair Joelle Kuphal meme maroon monitor hack monitor Port Samirview Sleek Granite Soap Generic Car Qualityfocused zero tolerance Meme Gear sega sonic sonic the hedgehog comics sonic boom sonic universe offpanel sonic x comic series archie knuckles Omari Quitzon I meme black interface bypass interface Tillmanview Rustic Wooden Soap Incredible Keyboard Ameliorated executive Meme Gear nazi german fps video game id software 90s video game title e3 Oswald OConnell meme lavender program hack program New Baileyberg Licensed Wooden Table Incredible Shirt Upgradable 4th generation Meme Gear none -
submitted by areohdeee to MemeGear [link] [comments]


2017.10.10 20:04 WelcomeToMoes Best of /r/FloridaGators - Week 6

Welcome to the Week 6 edition of Best of /FloridaGators where users win flair more dope than Florida's new unis for their quality contributions to this sub!
Even though the Gators couldn't bring home the W, this sub continued to produce its tail off. I can't express how proud I am of these users, and yet there's a lot more weeks of football left, and I think that's pretty neat.
Best of /FloridaGators - Week 5 Runner-up:
This week's runner up goes to zlatandiego for keeping us in the know on UF's recruiting efforts with a massive list of updates and visitors for the LSU-UF game. zlatandiego, aka the Varys of UF Recruiting, is one of the jewels of this sub for consistently getting and keeping us hard.
Best of /FloridaGators - Week 5 Winner:
This week's award goes to bullsci for his comprehensive, insightful and surprisingly accurate LSU-UF pre-game analysis. bullsci was bound to win since he has been nominated more than any other user to date! Congrats, and keep doing what you do!
Additional Week 6 Nominations:
Please join us in congratulating these users for their outstanding work!
2017 Hall of Fame Members:
Here's how Best of /FloridaGators works:
  1. Anyone with original content (post or comment) can be nominated, just tag me and let me know you're nominating.
  2. Each winner joins the Hall of Fame and gets to vote for the subsequent winners.
  3. A user may only win once per season.
  4. A week runs Monday to Sunday. Winners will be announced each Tuesday (or as soon as I receive the votes from the Hall of Fame)
submitted by WelcomeToMoes to FloridaGators [link] [comments]


2016.11.02 16:00 tripsd State of the program - Swimming and Diving

There is a lot of discussion about football on the sub, but one of my passions is swimming. The swimming season is in full swing and UF historically is quite good. I figured I would put together a little summary of the program. If there is any interest I could post a couple follow ups through out the season detailing how the program is doing. Even if there's no interest, hope people enjoy the write up. I haven't been close to the program in quite a while so please feel free to correct anything you feel is wrong. Also apologies I can't live up to the formatting and detail that hammer has set as the standard.
Head coach: Gregg Troy (1999-Current)
Coach Troy has been a landmark in the swimming community for decades. He coached at Bolles in Jacksonville for 20 years before joining the UF program. His run at Bolles was unprecedented, winning 15 boys and 11 girls state championships. Notably Troy coached Anthony Nesty at Bolles. Nesty won gold in the 100 m butterfly in 1988, and is still the only medalist from his home country of Suriname. Troy was selected as an assistant coach for the 1996 Olympic team as a high school coach. He has followed that up with great success at UF. He was the US head Olympic coach in 2012 and has won NCAA coach of the year 3 times (two times for men and once for women). Under Troy’s tenure the Gators have been a perennial top 10 team for both men and women. In 2010, the women won a national title.
Notable coaching changes:
The aforementioned Nesty is on staff at UF currently. Nesty spent time after his Olympic victory coaching at Bolles and has been with UF for 10 years. In his first year, Jeff Poppell has just joined the staff. Poppell’s most recent stop was also Bolles after spending time as the women’s head coach at Arkansas. This offseason brought the resignation of Martn Wilby (whom Poppell replaces), who had been with the program since Troy started at UF. On a personal note, Wilby was an awesome guy and it is sad to see him leave the program. Wilby is joining T2 Aquatics. Bryan Gillooly is in his first season as the diving coach after time at FAU. Bryan replaces Dale Shultz, who returned to his Arkansas where he had been prior to joining the Gators in 2014. Before Shultz the diving program was led by Donnie Craine. Donnie had led the diving program for 30 seasons but passed away in 2014. Again on a personal note, Donnie was one of the best people you will ever meet and I was sad to hear about his passing.
Recruiting:
Recruiting for swimming is not quite as exciting as football. However, much like football, UF is in a competitive but fruitful conference. There are four SEC teams (Bama at 5, UGA at 7, UF at 8 and Auburn at 10) in the men’s top ten team rankings. There are two SEC teams (UGA at 8 and Auburn at 10) in the women’s top ten team rankings. Florida is a hot bed for high school swimming, with the good weather and a culture that embraces the water, but there is a lot of competition for those recruits. Recruiting rankings are a bit hard to find but according to swimswam.com, the men pulled the #4 recruiting class and the #12 women’s class in 2016.
Performance to date:
Both the men and women have had a rough start to the season. The women started the season with a victory at the Florida Invitational, a three day meet featuring Miami (FL), Florida Gulf Coast, Nova Southeastern, and Keiser. You would expect the Gators to be dominate against these team and they were, with the women capturing 12 individual and 3 relay victories. The women followed this up with a close win in Tallahassee, winning 8 of 16 events (but none of the relays). The women then traveled to Bloomington Indiana for a double dual meet (long course on day one and short course on day two) against Texas and Indiana. The women were swept in all four competitions by losing twice to Texas and Indiana each. UF swam against UGA last Friday in another dual meet. Again the Gators came out on the wrong end, losing 125-164. UF shouldn’t feel too bad, as UGA’s women carry a 101 home meet win streak. The women are flirting with the edge of top 20, coming in at 18th.
Much like the women, the men started with a victory at the Florida Invitational. Though competition was more limited with only Nova and Keiser competing. They also beat FSU winning 11 of 16 events in the dual meet. Traveling with the women to Bloomington, the men were swept in all four competitions by losing twice to Texas and Indiana each. Best performances were probably in the 200 IM. In Friday’s dual meet against UGA the men fell 178-122. Highlights include Caleb Dressel winning the 50 free and Jan Switkowski winning the 200 IM. The men are currently sitting in 8th in team rankings.
The takeaway: the Gators have swum against some good teams so far this year. Also, swimming is a bit different than many other sports; the regular season doesn’t matter too much. That said, I don’t think this is going to be strongest post season Gators team we have seen in recent years. I was trying to just get a bunch of status updates out this week, but if people are interested I can try to go a bit more in depth in the outlook for the year.
News and notes:
In very sad news, UF swimming alum Ryan Lochte was kicked off Dancing with the Stars.
submitted by tripsd to FloridaGators [link] [comments]


2016.09.22 00:21 RegularGuy815 Inspired by my Survivor post from a couple months ago...here are some major events the final 3 and jury has missed out on

Original sequester dates: June 6 - 12(?)
LeBron James and Cleveland Cavaliers win NBA championship; renewed debates on gun control, including a senate filibuster and house sit-in; U.K. votes to leave European Union, causing stock markets to fall and David Cameron to resign as Prime Minister, he is replaced by Theresa May; back-to-back deaths of black men by police officers sparks a new round of national protests, with a man in Dallas killing 4 officers by sniper fire; Trump and Clinton name Mike Pence and Tim Kaine as running mates and both conventions are held; Olympic games in Rio and the subsequent Ryan Lochte scandal; massive flooding in Louisiana; death of actor Gene Wilder; wannabe terrorist plants several bombs in New York and New Jersey, resulting in non-life-threatening injuries, and is arrested; no one will look at “Skittles” the same way again. (EDIT: And Pokemon Go) (EDIT: removed nightclub shooting, as apparently they heard about that)
Death of Muhammad Ali was June 3, not sure any were sequestered by then though.
I'm sure there are some more minor events of note.
submitted by RegularGuy815 to BigBrother [link] [comments]


2016.09.12 15:35 WildHoneyChild TM Dreams

I just woke up from a dream about Rhine and Maci lol.
I guess I was friends with them, or maybe I was dating Ryan, but we were all hanging out in this big ass truck and Maci was sitting in the back seat. I was telling them how I was happy that they seemed to really be getting along and able to co-parent for Bentley. I was like "nobody's perfect, and y'all aren't best friends, but you seem really mature!"
Maci thanked me and Ryan just kind of nodded and stared blankly ahead, then he and I went into this gas station. He bought a bunch of beer and for some reason a bunch of Ryan Lochte merchandise??? We walked back to the truck and Maci made a comment about how he spends his money, and he just snapped and said, "Damn Maci shut up, you're so rude and stupid!"
I just had to laugh my ass off at it. Anyone else had any weird/hilarious Teen Mom dreams lately?
submitted by WildHoneyChild to teenmom [link] [comments]


2016.08.31 21:55 TagProLeaderboards Daily Leaderboard Log/Statistics for 2016-08-31

View graphs and charts for this and previous leaderboards at http://tpl.faltro.com
The human-readable archive of this data is available at http://tpl.faltro.com/history/daily?date=2016-08-31
The CSV file for this data is available at http://tpl.faltro.com/static/history/daily/16-08-31.csv
# Name Points Win% Games Wins Losses Save% Tags Popped Grabs Captures Hold Prevent Returns Support Pup% Time DCs
1 SKYWALKER QC 2345 61% 94 57 34 1043 372 248 25 00:24:25 01:42:30 861 1619 10% 08:49:00 0
2 wise_gerber 1820 45% 96 43 46 0% 496 678 560 51 01:23:22 00:38:05 351 1248 18% 07:25:19 4
3 anti-re 1796 64% 89 57 28 544 544 441 51 01:01:06 00:45:05 386 1261 21% 06:27:30 4
4 Oppressor 1605 40% 84 34 43 417 672 531 29 01:07:54 00:44:32 292 1268 12% 07:10:26 7
5 Diggs 1525 51% 86 43 29 0% 439 503 406 50 01:09:30 00:45:33 379 1182 10% 06:09:29 12
6 zeeres 1496 60% 65 39 24 100% 495 524 397 45 00:57:08 00:37:54 372 1253 16% 05:57:56 0
7 Ploffin 1490 66% 65 43 20 422 489 391 48 01:01:53 00:40:38 312 1198 18% 05:33:48 1
8 dandandandan 1475 64% 69 44 25 565 448 385 54 00:57:27 00:31:57 395 960 24% 05:10:53 0
9 Kry 1458 60% 86 51 19 50% 415 570 417 58 01:10:50 00:29:27 359 1253 7% 06:00:39 15
10 KyrieIrving 1382 64% 74 47 20 50% 414 423 379 54 01:02:09 00:31:58 302 1021 15% 05:05:16 6
11 Akul 1308 61% 63 37 21 0% 316 448 379 40 01:06:13 00:33:12 228 947 14% 05:15:18 0
12 starboard 1300 67% 58 39 19 100% 467 385 263 33 00:29:57 00:28:41 291 848 24% 04:47:55 0
13 POOTS 1281 59% 64 38 24 328 459 364 35 00:50:03 00:51:34 258 857 11% 05:13:19 1
14 lays 1251 51% 65 33 29 100% 319 484 407 51 01:02:47 00:19:06 216 863 21% 05:10:06 1
15 WonderBall 1221 58% 60 35 23 437 457 362 29 00:40:47 00:51:51 373 1121 12% 04:46:33 2
16 Juked. 1212 48% 64 30 26 0% 266 492 358 25 00:50:25 00:28:21 213 832 12% 05:00:39 6
17 Robopop 1201 53% 60 31 24 67% 427 400 291 27 00:50:18 00:39:47 362 763 12% 04:46:43 4
18 wave 1137 65% 47 30 14 0% 332 329 285 35 00:40:46 00:43:49 265 1003 12% 04:16:39 0
19 HardToMiss 1087 53% 60 32 25 100% 217 447 397 48 01:06:09 00:18:40 174 741 10% 04:29:43 2
20 <2 1061 43% 63 27 28 233 435 314 20 00:46:24 00:32:12 175 841 7% 04:45:28 6
21 JDilla 1056 57% 49 28 20 248 414 297 25 00:35:55 00:29:12 199 695 9% 04:14:21 0
22 billy 1042 63% 52 32 17 67% 344 329 245 23 00:36:13 00:36:42 294 887 10% 04:13:10 1
23 Auballmeyang 1038 46% 49 22 26 0% 271 441 370 22 01:04:05 00:20:31 213 761 13% 04:33:09 0
24 Not trying 1038 47% 51 24 26 100% 258 298 229 28 00:40:34 00:31:11 176 633 28% 04:06:24 1
25 oh! 1037 71% 51 36 15 100% 272 372 270 35 00:34:38 00:24:54 216 687 11% 03:47:10 0
26 Wanket 1013 50% 58 29 28 251 370 264 15 00:30:21 00:29:15 193 888 9% 04:18:50 1
27 Jerry. 1009 58% 43 25 16 293 359 306 38 00:45:11 00:28:29 211 916 17% 03:48:32 1
28 scoobydoo 1007 58% 52 30 22 267 329 254 30 00:33:37 00:24:27 192 696 14% 03:51:53 0
29 Pup Snatcher 1002 58% 43 25 18 246 396 336 28 00:42:39 00:28:12 181 904 19% 03:49:57 0
30 fractal 1001 49% 45 22 22 100% 226 390 329 28 00:58:05 00:14:53 161 740 12% 03:58:53 1
31 Pepto Dismal 974 53% 52 27 21 0% 290 285 204 21 00:30:00 00:23:46 225 669 14% 03:50:05 3
32 Some3Balls 959 50% 59 29 27 50% 262 400 337 46 00:49:48 00:22:29 209 795 9% 04:05:11 2
33 Plerb 957 37% 53 19 32 0% 265 357 287 23 00:41:23 00:27:06 198 859 15% 04:06:54 0
34 ZenWhisper 933 72% 51 36 12 0% 357 255 207 32 00:28:54 00:21:53 274 609 19% 03:18:39 1
35 Nooga 907 55% 45 24 18 0% 317 304 237 25 00:28:31 00:29:16 253 726 20% 03:25:34 1
36 tmmmbl 907 57% 54 29 20 0% 260 248 201 20 00:27:51 00:31:31 216 487 15% 03:36:30 2
37 FreakBall 905 62% 47 28 16 60% 360 277 214 25 00:28:20 00:26:26 272 567 16% 03:38:11 0
38 Canadian 903 30% 73 22 35 243 435 327 30 00:39:02 00:34:03 189 814 11% 04:09:43 16
39 TWD 903 46% 47 21 24 50% 213 344 288 26 00:43:28 00:28:39 173 624 10% 03:59:51 0
40 EatMyShorts 897 48% 45 21 22 0% 243 274 220 22 00:38:10 00:29:31 190 613 14% 03:44:16 1
41 Android 894 66% 41 27 13 258 272 202 28 00:29:50 00:23:02 210 626 13% 03:09:12 0
42 AvA 887 54% 51 27 19 0% 284 325 256 24 00:27:33 00:32:39 245 863 7% 03:32:48 3
43 binarybinary 873 35% 53 18 20 0% 395 263 173 12 00:25:50 00:29:56 293 767 18% 03:40:41 14
44 Chickn Dinnr 860 42% 46 19 23 0% 276 303 242 20 00:34:02 00:15:19 162 592 20% 03:31:53 3
45 Ballsam Fir 858 41% 56 23 32 246 275 182 17 00:15:53 00:41:08 226 682 4% 03:33:44 1
46 Kerfuffle! 853 55% 51 27 20 0% 329 243 161 12 00:17:46 00:26:36 241 645 11% 03:14:51 3
47 Ziltoid 840 51% 39 20 19 203 260 224 24 00:31:45 00:29:06 178 961 7% 03:25:13 0
48 waterwheel 837 74% 44 32 9 50% 288 250 235 36 00:28:49 00:25:16 252 837 11% 03:02:05 1
49 Jump Ball 826 81% 39 30 7 0% 272 218 206 39 00:33:26 00:11:04 199 498 16% 02:40:36 0
50 banzai 824 69% 36 25 10 334 215 160 16 00:25:18 00:37:11 290 691 9% 02:57:35 0
51 Stimpy 823 57% 41 23 16 50% 259 279 189 14 00:24:59 00:25:52 221 601 10% 03:26:28 0
52 Oh No! 822 49% 47 23 23 266 281 226 24 00:32:00 00:18:55 209 667 16% 03:22:04 1
53 WhoIsMe? 814 30% 62 17 21 0% 238 496 387 25 00:48:11 00:14:11 164 771 11% 04:24:42 19
54 il fenomeno 807 47% 34 16 18 257 222 174 22 00:32:37 00:15:27 141 885 22% 03:00:34 0
55 grass 804 55% 51 28 14 100% 263 282 247 33 00:44:41 00:19:17 197 665 13% 03:10:32 9
56 CatPuke 803 64% 45 28 16 67% 300 281 195 21 00:24:59 00:21:01 234 524 15% 03:12:51 0
57 popcorn pimp 803 37% 53 19 23 0% 258 299 202 17 00:23:54 00:27:30 218 648 7% 03:25:18 10
58 Clintan 800 36% 47 16 27 0% 128 414 308 28 00:37:51 00:17:40 111 712 6% 03:37:40 2
59 adrianpsin 796 48% 40 19 18 100% 246 275 182 14 00:29:25 00:15:43 144 609 14% 03:15:50 1
60 Holdmaballs 793 57% 46 25 14 33% 274 263 217 28 00:30:13 00:14:00 189 498 15% 02:51:35 5
61 mullty 789 45% 54 24 16 0% 274 318 210 24 00:25:53 00:20:06 219 871 9% 03:08:50 13
62 LogisticMap 785 71% 34 24 9 100% 164 227 189 19 00:30:55 00:14:51 139 510 11% 02:44:51 1
63 Chuck Finley 782 42% 52 22 27 215 319 231 26 00:30:10 00:20:39 157 495 12% 03:20:54 3
64 Scrapper8o 777 55% 40 22 17 100% 209 276 184 14 00:22:37 00:20:41 174 631 11% 03:12:32 1
65 bitw 767 67% 39 24 11 40% 213 281 234 34 00:37:46 00:12:54 170 609 12% 03:02:19 1
66 SonofThunder 762 51% 35 18 14 186 264 258 22 00:46:05 00:17:01 152 733 9% 03:06:14 3
67 Milkmandan 759 53% 32 17 14 232 225 166 12 00:20:05 00:32:32 186 664 9% 03:06:32 1
68 WhiteBallker 754 62% 43 26 15 0% 219 251 210 26 00:32:50 00:19:21 178 636 10% 03:06:47 0
69 13eavuss 752 51% 46 23 20 0% 162 363 279 30 00:28:14 00:26:59 147 797 5% 03:22:31 2
70 hamsun 745 53% 49 26 15 245 236 207 32 00:29:47 00:15:01 163 517 16% 02:45:51 8
71 str8_burnin 742 58% 33 19 11 241 214 181 14 00:23:15 00:16:17 158 515 19% 02:37:48 2
72 BallBQ 736 60% 42 24 13 33% 212 271 201 16 00:23:19 00:19:56 158 718 9% 02:46:04 4
73 Adele Dazeem 731 64% 34 21 11 0% 214 179 123 10 00:21:09 00:21:50 162 476 10% 02:45:36 1
74 team pls 728 62% 34 21 12 219 213 188 21 00:29:27 00:11:52 166 412 16% 02:35:14 0
75 LochteAway 728 60% 40 24 11 128 202 171 25 00:36:43 00:09:31 83 313 13% 02:41:36 5
76 AnthonyDavis 723 51% 41 21 15 242 221 178 23 00:27:05 00:17:37 143 462 24% 02:49:04 5
77 Word. 722 55% 38 21 13 216 298 222 23 00:28:57 00:16:42 159 593 17% 02:59:55 3
78 limpin 721 47% 32 15 14 232 314 257 13 00:29:56 00:28:31 194 963 7% 03:11:26 0
79 Ippo 715 80% 30 24 6 242 184 157 26 00:23:17 00:24:30 173 586 23% 02:25:23 0
80 hihi! 709 40% 40 16 24 100% 181 268 195 18 00:21:22 00:18:02 144 558 11% 02:48:08 0
81 whippitz 703 53% 43 23 16 182 323 223 22 00:27:54 00:13:09 131 624 10% 03:00:47 4
82 Bad Horse 702 47% 31 14 14 0% 201 232 158 10 00:19:10 00:30:28 163 626 10% 02:51:18 0
83 MrSaggyballs 702 63% 35 20 12 0% 210 235 189 18 00:28:26 00:15:01 150 487 16% 02:47:39 0
84 Tom brady 698 63% 31 19 9 0% 215 216 179 21 00:24:09 00:27:23 166 697 11% 02:45:02 2
85 pstch 691 53% 36 19 7 172 224 185 31 00:36:23 00:07:20 147 386 11% 02:38:25 8
86 topofthepops 673 55% 40 22 12 222 204 186 26 00:24:33 00:25:42 187 665 11% 02:43:09 4
87 winder 670 38% 33 12 19 0% 211 285 206 13 00:27:45 00:14:28 153 552 12% 02:58:58 1
88 Smallz 666 73% 23 16 6 67% 180 219 188 24 00:32:30 00:11:01 142 505 13% 02:24:46 0
89 Toogs 665 66% 37 23 11 33% 191 222 164 23 00:24:27 00:20:10 141 464 11% 02:36:57 0
90 Jarbs 662 39% 33 13 20 140 254 198 12 00:29:03 00:21:59 105 509 14% 02:51:13 0
91 Jinjo 661 62% 29 18 10 166 260 205 21 00:32:50 00:10:34 123 554 18% 02:33:05 1
92 NEUhusky 658 74% 31 23 7 100% 208 201 192 37 00:33:48 00:14:10 166 499 16% 02:23:08 1
93 Nightballer 655 58% 34 19 14 67% 236 138 86 8 00:07:59 00:28:33 199 496 11% 02:23:39 0
94 lime 654 50% 32 15 14 0% 230 235 196 16 00:33:23 00:19:20 199 462 9% 02:38:13 1
95 skeletor 652 46% 35 16 16 170 260 197 17 00:30:58 00:18:12 127 526 13% 02:40:33 3
96 10 651 58% 40 22 10 0% 215 235 187 29 00:31:14 00:14:24 153 523 19% 02:35:27 6
97 Canadsian 648 65% 26 17 7 215 162 139 20 00:25:35 00:15:42 183 387 12% 02:17:45 2
98 Balled Eagle 646 52% 31 16 15 202 258 210 19 00:21:00 00:24:26 165 574 13% 02:35:48 0
99 MetricUntil 645 47% 30 14 14 147 257 218 24 00:50:21 00:12:49 98 368 18% 02:44:30 0
100 STG 645 49% 36 17 18 0% 160 261 141 6 00:14:37 00:13:59 126 457 10% 02:36:26 0
submitted by TagProLeaderboards to TagPro [link] [comments]


2016.08.26 05:16 autotldr Brazilian police charge Ryan Lochte with filing false robbery report

This is an automatic summary, original reduced by 68%.
Brazilian police charged American swimmer Ryan Lochte on Thursday with filing a false robbery report over an incident during the Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.
A police statement said Lochte would be informed in the United States so he could decide whether to introduce a defense in Brazil.
"The investigation was concluded on Thursday and Olympic American swimmer Ryan Lochte was indicted for the crime of falsely reporting a crime," the statement said.
During the games, Lochte initially said that he and fellow swimmers Jack Conger, Gunnar Bentz and Jimmy Feigen were robbed at gunpoint in a taxi by men with a police badge as they returned to the Olympic Village from a party Aug. 15.
Lochte could be tried in absentia if he didn't return to face the charge.
The United States and Brazil have an extradition treaty dating back to the 1960s, but Brazil has a long history of not extraditing its own citizens to other nations and U.S. authorities could take the same stance if Lochte is found guilty.
Summary Source FAQ Theory Feedback Top five keywords: Lochte#1 Brazil#2 Olympic#3 swimmer#4 crime#5
Post found in /worldnews.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic only. Do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.
submitted by autotldr to autotldr [link] [comments]


2016.08.26 02:03 autotldr Rio police charge Ryan Lochte with filing a false robbery report

This is an automatic summary, original reduced by 65%.
Brazilian police charged American swimmer Ryan Lochte on Thursday with filing a false robbery report over an incident during the Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.
A police statement said Lochte would be informed in the United States so he could decide whether to introduce a defense in Brazil.
Lochte initially said that he and fellow swimmers Jack Conger, Gunnar Bentz and Jimmy Feigen were robbed at gunpoint in a taxi by men with a police badge as they returned to the Olympic Village from a party on 15 August.
Lochte has since acknowledged that he was highly intoxicated and that his behavior led to the confrontation.
Lochte could be tried in absentia if he didn't return to face the charge.
The United States and Brazil have an extradition treaty dating back to the 1960s, but Brazil has a long history of not extraditing its own citizens to other nations and US authorities could take the same stance if Lochte is found guilty.
Summary Source FAQ Theory Feedback Top five keywords: Lochte#1 Brazil#2 Olympic#3 swimmer#4 return#5
Post found in /worldnews and /BreakingNews24hr.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic only. Do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.
submitted by autotldr to autotldr [link] [comments]


2016.08.26 01:11 autotldr Rio police charge Ryan Lochte with false report of robbery

This is an automatic summary, original reduced by 55%.
Brazilian police charged American swimmer Ryan Lochte on Thursday with filing a false robbery report over an incident during the Olympics in Rio de Janeiro.
A police statement said Lochte would be informed in the United States so he could decide whether to introduce a defense in Brazil.
Lochte initially said that he and fellow swimmers Jack Conger, Gunnar Bentz and Jimmy Feigen were robbed at gunpoint in a taxi by men with a police badge as they returned to the Olympic Village from a party Aug. 15.
Lochte could be tried in absentia if he didn't return to face the charge.
The United States and Brazil have an extradition treaty dating back to the 1960s, but Brazil has a long history of not extraditing its own citizens to other nations and U.S. authorities could take the same stance if Lochte is found guilty.
That is currently the case of the head of Brazil's football confederation, Marco Polo del Nero, who faces charges in the wide-ranging scandal entangling international soccer's ruling body, FIFA. He has not travelled outside Brazil for more than a year to avoid being arrested by U.S. authorities somewhere else.
Summary Source FAQ Theory Feedback Top five keywords: Lochte#1 Brazil#2 Olympic#3 swimmer#4 face#5
Post found in /news.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic only. Do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.
submitted by autotldr to autotldr [link] [comments]


2016.08.23 11:02 gomeztogo ACS: 2016-08-23-Eddie Braun and Jo Koy

Image Gallery: http://imgur.com/a/0eFFb
Adam opens the show talking about his exciting weekend in Monterey. First, he talks about not being able to race, and then complains about an obnoxious driver they had to pass along the way to the track. He also chats about meeting Carroll Shelby’s grandson, rants about a horrible woman they met at the track, and tells more fun stories with his son in tow. Adam then talks to fans about respect in the industry, and having a job that isn’t a bummer.
Eddie Braun is in studio next, and Adam talks with him about his work as a stuntman on various films. The guys also discuss the legacy of Evel Knievel, and why Eddie is going to attempt the incredible Snake River Canyon Jump that Evel was unable to complete. Gina then begins the news with information about the end of the Olympics, and the fallout from Ryan Lochte lying about being robbed at gunpoint in Rio. As the show wraps up, the guys talk about competing fairly, and the building excitement for Eddie’s jump.
 
Go to http://kickstarter.com and search for ‘Evel Spirit’ to contribute to his campaign. You can also follow today’s guest on Twitter @CRSH4CSH.
Also subscribe to The Koy Pond, and check out http://jokoy.com for upcoming live dates. Please follow Jo on Twitter @JoKoy.
 
Producers: Mike August, Mike Lynch, and Mike Dawson Co-Producers: Gary Smith, Chris Laxamana, and Matt Fondiler Newsgirl: Gina Grad Sound Effects: Bryan Bishop
 
Post generated by ACSBot from http://adamcarolla.com/eddie-braun-and-jo-koy/
submitted by gomeztogo to AdamCarolla [link] [comments]


2016.08.22 05:11 throwaway012490 Me [32 M] with my husband [33 M] of 2 years, I have problems with his past

Long time lurker, first time poster. So I met the love of my life two years ago (on Grindr) and we got married about a year ago. I know that's an accelerated timeline, but we are absolutely made for each other - same interests, same professions, have a BLAST together. I've never been more in love in my life. This is a marriage to last. However, I feel like I keep causing drama and here's why:
Me - I grew up in an abusive household and had really horrible self esteem throughout my teenage years. I went to great college and spent those years partying my ass off but never came out of the closet. Spent 4 years as a Navy officer after that, but never came out during any of those years because of my insecurities always thinking I wasn't worth anything. I literally spent 8 years of my life, closeted, attractive, fun, and didn't have sex a single time because I thought I was this unattractive guy that everyone secretly hated. I spent a lot of time at the gym, alone, maintained myself, was (and still am) always friendly, but seriously never got laid because I was either too nervous, or ashamed, or thought that some guy would find some flaw on me, etc etc. I only used Grindr to chat with guys, but would never meet up because of my ridiculous insecurities.
My husband - grew up in a normal household, went to college, but (if I can say this without being braggy), was a stud. Ripped body, outgoing personality, tons of friends, super fun, and got laid all the time. His stories of (and I know them to be true) involve wild orgies, picking up as many as 6 guys up in a single day, getting bored with one three way or get on Grindr to get two other guys to join... etc.. etc...
The meeting - we met on Grindr 2 years ago while I was in bed at home and he was looking for a third in his hotel room. We actually started chatting about travel (he leads the travel program for a Fortune 100 company and I work on the corporate side of a major airline), and decided to meet for a drink the next day. We hit it off immediately. It was so much fun and we actually booked a trip together the second date. I can't even describe how amazing this relationship has been. He proposed to me (on a flight of course) several months later and we got married a year.
The problem - He has never been anything but the best. He arranges amazing surprises when we travel, he holds me at night, he goes so far out of his way to make me happy. And I try to do the same. He and I have long deleted any 'dating' apps and he and I have an amazing sex life. HOWEVER - I constantly, and mostly out of jealousy, make these random rude comments about his past. Just this week, he was talking about his trip to Thailand a couple of years back and how he loved this island he went to, and it made me scorn and make some remark about a 5-way he organized back then which resulted in us arguing. He keeps reminding me that his past is his past and he is 100% dedicated to me. I try to keep it down, but I feel like a) I missed out on a crazy sex life that he had because now I'm confident and ready to play (but I don't want to cheat on him ever) and b) I find parts of his past really gross - who has sex with EIGHT different guys over a weekend???!!! But like last night, we were watching the Olympics coverage about the scandal and I said something about Lochte being hot and he casually said "Oh, I've fucked so many hotter guys than him!" which set me off on an argumentative tirade. He apologized profusely for saying that later, but it kicked in a trigger for me.
Conclusion - I have an amazing marriage with a dedicated husband, but his past keeps driving me nuts. What do I do?
tl;dr: I have an amazing marriage with a dedicated husband, but his past keeps driving me nuts. What do I do?
submitted by throwaway012490 to relationships [link] [comments]


2016.07.16 17:12 TheThunderbird Lochte Gets A Tan, Ledecky Finds A Date In Phelps Live Facebook Video

submitted by TheThunderbird to michaelphelps [link] [comments]


2016.07.16 17:09 TheThunderbird Lochte Gets A Tan, Ledecky Finds A Date In Phelps Live Facebook Video

Lochte Gets A Tan, Ledecky Finds A Date In Phelps Live Facebook Video submitted by TheThunderbird to swimmingnews [link] [comments]


2014.10.31 00:00 Calasime MQ UHC II Final Teams

Here are the final teams for the UHC, there is no backing out now(unless you have to)
Team DKP: KuzonFilm, K54, PieisAwesomeful, Devito44
Team Filmakers(Dragons + Koh): Ceige_,Bipen, izixs, Kohtalon
Team Buzz the 54th Asian: WhatTh3Buzz, ThatBlazinAsian, pandamainia, Negnar_Holf
Team Lochtness Kavlo: Dagekkie, ScotDineHell, Kavlo, MasterofSarcasm
Team Thesil3ntscrozzy88 : tmha88, sil3nt_gam3r, _Hscrozzy, butcherxd
Team Maxus, The ArcaneCobra: cobraclaw18, ArCaNe_TeMp3sT, maxus2222, Lazerboy99
Team Blazin' Roses for ZenEsper: Roselen, WarriorofEsper, Blazy36, Zensten
Team Numbers: Cat656, david3111, the4bestgame
Team Hawk Wasn't Late: HawkShadow89, Braigar, thedspecialist, Insiodine
These are the teams for the second Magic Quarter Ultra Hardcore II.
OFFICIAL DATE: November 8th at 4:00 PM EST(Not EDT, if theres even a difference) Do the conversions yourself if you need to.
We will be taking pictures after the event, if I miss the pictures try to wait for me since I would like to be in them this time.
ORGANIZE YOUR TEAMS AND HOW YOU WILL TALK BEFORE NOVEMBER 4.
Edit: Team numbers will have 3 members due to cpmetis being unable to make it due to personal reasons.
submitted by Calasime to MagicQuarter [link] [comments]


2014.10.24 01:33 Calasime MQ UHC Teams with Names

Team DKP: KuzonFilm, nb_the_king, PieisAwesomeful, HawkShadow89
Team Filmakers(Dragons + Koh): Ceige_,Bipen, izixs, Kohtalon(can't leave you by yourself)
Team Buzz the 54th Asian: WhatTh3Buzz, ThatBlazinAsian, K54
Team Lochtness Kavlo: Dagekkie, ScotDineHell, Kavlo,MasterofSarcasm
Team Thesil3ntscrozzy88 : tmha88,sil3nt_gam3r, _Hscrozzy, butcherxd
Team Maxus, The ArcaneCobra: cobraclaw18, Arcane_Tempest(Not gonna do username to much work), maxus2222, Lazerboy99 (Can't leave you out either)
Team No Mic: Roselen, WarriorofEsper, Blazy36
Team Numbers: Cat656, Robertcp12, david3111
If you desperately want to move teams, tell me on this post. Or if you come up with a team name you want to use.
Now try and get in contact with each other in some way.
(Koh and Hawk, if you two want to become a team or just stay the way you are just tell me)
The date will be November 22(possibly 15th if date doesn't work for a lot of you)
submitted by Calasime to MagicQuarter [link] [comments]


2014.08.01 03:52 ODG1070 My Sister's Husband Had an Affair and We Found This "Short Story" on their Computer

The Pool After Dark, or How I Learned to Love Swimming Even More
By J*** J***
VW and I were staying at Harrah’s Casino and Resort in Atlantic City during my convention for work. I haven’t bunked at Harrah’s since the early years of this century, when the hotel was still decorated in bright colors more suitable for a wardrobe from The Cosby Show . In 2013, I found it as tastefully-decorated as Atlantic City could be.
Harrah’s boasts perhaps the largest indoor pool among the casinos, topped with an impressive glass dome and ringed with hot tubs and cabanas. I remarked to VW that this was the most Vegas-looking pool I have ever seen in town, and I’ve been slumming from casino to casino for 20 years.
After enjoying lunch in one of the hot tubs, we noticed that after 10 p.m., the quiet, airy confines under the dome become The Pool After Dark. It appears to be some sort of nightclub. I’ve probably seen the interior of more nightclubs on episodes of Jersey Shore than in person, but this prospect seemed more enticing than sitting in our hotel room fretting over the broken WiFi. Besides, The Pool After Dark contains the word “pool,” which is generally an incentive for me to visit the place.
I blew out of my dinner obligation shortly after 9 p.m. and rescued VW from a cigar-chomping consigliore from North Jersey who probably knew how to make a delicious Sunday gravy when he wasn’t out offing snitches. We knew that 10 p.m. meant that we could jump back into the pool. We ran up to our room and excitedly donned our swim suits.
VW had inquired earlier about the dress code for the Pool After Dark. “You may wear your swimsuit under your nightclub clothes” said the attendant. I had no idea what “nightclub clothes” meant. I generally dressed like a Land’s End model when going out to one of these places rather than Pauly D., but a pair of khakis and a tight new shirt would probably get me past the guards.
We lined up with hundreds of well-heeled engineers and ladies dressed for a night out. VW scored some free tickets and we were soon scampering past the engineers and over to the bar.
We talked, we laughed, we ground our hips together. A pleasant suburban Dad called VW “smoking hot.” This is what happens when I leave my friend to use the men’s room.
With my date recaptured and our drinks emptied, it was time to walk over to the pool itself. Throbbing guido music and engineers networking over their cash bar were peppered with younger clubgoers right out of MTV. Two well-bootied go-go dancers writhed on metal platforms placed at each corner of the pool. A few of the male engineers stood and gawked at the dancers, wondering why their wives or girlfriends weren’t that sexy.
VW and I wiggled our way through the landlubbers and over to the lifeguard, who seemed rather nonplussed at the entire evening. I enjoy talking with lifeguards. Atlantic City has a long history of lifeguarding, swimming and other aquatic activities. I have long found that the Atlantic City Beach Patrol to be a political stepping stone for many aspiring public officials, but our lifeguard this evening honed his craft in nearby Pleasantville and appeared to be focused on lifeguarding an empty pool.
We removed our poor excuse for nightclub clothes and stood there alone among hundreds, clad only in our bathing suits.
I wore navy blue O’Neill shorts I snagged at a garage sale in Seaside Park. VW was clad in her standard striped board shorts and floral bikini top: conservative yet cute and sexy all at once.
We walked down the stairs and into the pool. I generally regard most pools as too warm for lap swimming; anything warmer than 83 degrees Fahrenheit is too damn uncomfortable. Unfortunately for this evening, Harrah’s pool would have made an excellent workout pool if judged solely on temperature.
VW and I were excited. We were slightly drunk. We were really digging each other. We shivered and tiptoed in the cool – but not frigid – water.
“Okay,” I thought. “You could be a real show-off and sprint up and down this pool like Ryan Lochte. Engineers with a 42 waist and muscle-laden guidos can’t swim worth a lick. Swimming is one of the few things you do well. You have poor math skills and you can’t dance worth a lick. Maybe these dudes would be impressed.”
I chose to goof around in the pool with VW instead. Most of the time, we pressed our stomachs and hips against each other. Our lips. My hands on VW’s waist and her arms over my shoulders. This was done partially out of affection and partially out of a desire to combine body heat.
The techno crap music blasted around us. The deejay mashed up beats into 30 second chunks that were changing too quickly and prevented us from sustaining a prolonged dance groove in the pool. The water hid the fact that I was a poor dancer on land; swaying as best as two whitebread dorks could to the music was more than adequate as the water soothed and slowed our gyrations but continued to keep us in step with whatever was emerging from the speakers.
I looked up. The low clouds lifted enough to reveal a moon high above and framed by the various towers of the Harrah’s complex. It was the first time VW and I saw the moon in person and together in many weeks.
Blue and red light beams bounced off of the dome, the palm trees, the cabanas and the water. We remained the sole humans in the pool. Alone amid hundreds, perhaps thousands of partiers and engineers. I would occasionally take my eyes off of VW to look around the room. Those dance lights would flutter and fly around the place, illuminating the attendees. The kids danced and grinded with drinks in their tanned hands and broad smiles on their tanned faces. The engineers stood nervously in their navy blazers and gray slacks and chatted with other engineers over drinks. Every few seconds, their networking would be broken by a glimpse at us in the pool. I knew that they were jealous. I knew that they wanted to be the guy with his arms wrapped around VW.
Us all alone. Us all together.
VW and I became two 12 year-old kids playing at the town pool while our Moms were sitting in the chaise loungers reading magazines.
“Lift me up,” asked VW.
She raised her legs and placed her feet in my hands. She rested her hands on my shoulders for a second and then hoisted herself up straight, emerging out of the pool from the middle of her calves. She attempted to dance. With 85% of her body now out of the stabilizing water, I found it difficult to keep VW steady, and she tumbled into the pool after a few seconds of dancing. Perhaps she was trying to draw attention away from the go-go dancers. Perhaps she noticed the subtle stares of the lonely engineers too.
“Launch me,” asked VW.
Now I play this game often with P** down in Seaside Park. We usually stand in the 5-foot surf and my son weighs around 70 lbs. VW is a slight woman, but she is a bit more muscular than P**.
Once again, VW’s feet are planted in my hands. She has never performed this stunt before.
“On ‘three,’” I said, “I want you to push off and up with your feet. Arch your back and throw yourself away from me.”
“Okay,” replied VW.
The disco music throbbed. The engineers gawked. The Jersey Shore gang writhed.
A few launch attempts left VW landing flat on her back in the water. We tried again. VW’s right food slipped out of my hand and kicked me in the right side of my ribcage.
I doubled over in pain while VW shot away from me. I staggered backwards. Immediately, I thought of my syncope. I didn’t want to faint in the pool. That could be fatal. Yet I couldn’t place my head between my knees either to return blood flow to my head, because that would leave my head underwater. Thankfully, I didn’t feel any of the symptoms of fainting approach. I took a few shallow breaths. My right lung hurt.
“Are you okay?” asked VW.
“No,” I squeaked. “I bruised my ribs. Ouch.”
VW was genuinely concerned and apologized. Pain or no pain, I didn’t want to leave. The monthlong recovery would have to wait until the evening was over.
My gaze returned to VW’s face. Her blue eyes, usually hidden behind glasses or dodging my looks with circling pupils, focused on mine. They quickly moved around in a clockwise direction to survey the madness of the room and then targeted once more on me. Here eyes widened: the brightest and most intense look I have ever witnessed in those eyes.
Those blue and red light beams from the dance floor flittered across her broad pale face and shot skyward around the dome. The bass continued to thump.
“I love this night and I love YOU,” she said to me.
She repeated this several times over the next hour.
“The stuff of legends.”
“One for the ages.”
Two suburban parents, hundreds of miles from home, surrounded by hundreds of strangers found themselves alone in a pool amid flashing lights, loud music and overpriced alcoholic beverages.
We goofed around for a while longer, swimming back and forth, holding each other tightly in our arms and continued to flow with whatever tunes were cranking from the DJ booth.
We were cold, so we left the pool. We walked to the exit in our bathing suits. The engineers stopped their drinking and networking and looked at us. The clubbers continued to dance, unaware of us snaking our way through the crowd.
We hastly threw on our nightclub wear. A hot shower was calling. It was usually the reward after a long pool swim for me and it would be our reward after this evening.
I loved this night and I loved VW.
Ding.
The elevator summoned us upstairs.
submitted by ODG1070 to Cringewriting [link] [comments]


2014.01.01 19:49 eaglehawkfalconbird [Script] Jake and Amir: Jake's Scroll

Hey /jakeandamir, here's my second script. Here's a link to the first one. I've been working on this one little by little for the past few months—you'll notice that it's set in the "old" office. Luckily, it has a lot of callbacks, and a lot of people seemed to like those in the most recent episode. Some of them are pretty subtle, though, so I'm interested to see whether you guys will catch them. You'll notice that this list is different from the ones Amir makes. I'm trying to keep it more like something Jake would write. Hopefully, ImAmirBlumenfeld and JakeHurwitz85 don't put me on blast for this. On a Wednesday, no less. Anyway, here it is. Let me know what you think!
JAKE and AMIR are both at their desks, silent. JAKE is wearing absolutely ridiculous clothing and has a rolled up piece of paper behind his ear. He is breathing heavily, trying to work up the courage to say something.
JAKE: (silent for a while, then really loudly): top ten accessories by JWitz. Or should I say JList? (insecure laugh)
AMIR: What are you--
JAKE: Zen ten: get to rest in a leather vest. Your fat's shed and your hat's red. That said, your cat's dead. Rest in... FLEECE. (Aggressively pulls at vest).
AMIR: I thought you said it was leather.
JAKE: Yeah, but I wasn't talking about my cat's vest then, was I? Number nine: feeling... time (Raises up hand, wearing six watches). Knock, knock (knocking motion to his own head): Last TIME I checked, there's no such thing as a clock block. Chicks will flock in overstock. The store.
AMIR: stop it.
JAKE: Number eight: save the date. Buying a bag doesn't have to be a drag. Holding her stuff is like a curse. So be a man... and buy... (raises above desk) a murse.
AMIR: Wow.
JAKE (high pitched): yeah.
AMIR: how are you so aware of the flaws in your ideas, yet you still follow through with them?
JAKE: Now this won't give you the blues. Number seven: blue suede-
AMIR: shoes?
JAKE: VEST, I said.
AMIR: another vest? You're wearing two?
JAKE: not RIGHT NOW, no. These are suggestions. (Under his breath) fucking asshole.
AMIR: what?
JAKE: look, you want a different one? Fine. Number seven: are you engines revving? Don't pass gas when you can pour it all over your back and legs in a crude sign of patriotism. Hashtag rash flag (shows his back with a somewhat-rectangular red area).
AMIR: not a flag.
JAKE: you just lack the patriotism brother. Number six: is for chicks.
AMIR: you stole that. Thief! Imposter!
JAKE: (Holds up watch hand) Your clocks bring the ticks, but you HAVE the dick. So number six is some gui-tar... FRANGS.
AMIR: what?
JAKE: STRINGS, I said. Look, don't interrupt me, man.
AMIR: why not say guitar picks? That way, you finish the rhyme, plus carrying around a set of guitar strings doesn't make any sense. At all.
JAKE: Ever think that I want to make my story believable? I went to a concert a few years ago, wearing a god damn guitar pick necklace. Apparently, I can't lie for shit, because I was called out and forcibly crowd-surfed out of the venue. The bass player started chanting threats at me, and everyone joined in.
AMIR: Oh my god.
JAKE: Not only that, but in some sick, coordinated effort to decimate my self-esteem, they all wrote me letters insulting me. I got them all yesterday (brings up large stack of letters to his desk). A blast from the past, if you will.
AMIR: I won't.
JAKE: Number five: swim AND dive. (Points to goggles around his neck). Or was Ryan Lochte at the 2012 Olympic after party sponsored by McDonald's NOT stylin'?
AMIR: Why casually wear goggles if you're trying to avoid being made fun of?
JAKE: Asstastic four: go door to door! With cords like yours, you'll want to know more.
AMIR: how is that an accessory? Those are pants.
JAKE: well, last time I checked, you don't answer my texts, so I need just, like, an outside opinion, man. (Laughs) Alright FUCK YOU, have you seen the movie?
AMIR: was that The Big Lebowski?
JAKE (mocking, unclear): "Was that the Fig Leblowki?"
AMIR: that's not what I said.
JAKE (calmed down, now cocky): Akeelah and the Three: or should I say Air Three'd? (basketball motion, laughs, then points to his hair): hair bead. Wear three.
AMIR: so bad.
JAKE: really? Because uh-oh! I made seven versions of the list so you couldn't hate it. How's that for insecure? And guess what? I've got a better one: C3P... Oh yeah. (Rips open vest to reveal Star Wars shirt)
AMIR: that's so much worse.
JAKE: chicks dig Star Wars, dude. I'd blow Haden Christiansen if he gave me the chance.
AMIR: Excuse you.
JAKE: No, I would.
AMIR: I know, just, cool it.
JAKE: Number brew (does the beer chugging thing from Corduroy Pants episode, then points to hair): do the 'do. Carry a spare well of hair gel to be slicked back with your dick packed. Now sit back—have a Tic Tac while the chick whacks.
AMIR: . . . why did you write any of this?
JAKE: NUMBER RUM (same chugging motion).
AMIR: lazy!
JAKE: sure, your cousin may shun. But he's a little twerp in the sleventh grade, so that doesn't count for shit. After all, you bought him booze, so you CAN'T lose. I blew Micah. At his girlfriend's quinciñera.
AMIR: you blew your brother?
JAKE: the point is that I got into a god damn quinciñera. How's that for multicultural raging?
AMIR: why, I guess?
JAKE: dude, shut up. Here comes Murph. Time 4... a number 4 (winks confidently). Hey, Murph, is it just me, or are these just cordgeous?
MURPH angrily attacks Jake
JAKE: ow, ow, stop it, dude, I'm not strong!
submitted by eaglehawkfalconbird to jakeandamir [link] [comments]


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